The Fuzzball Chronicles: the Life and Times of Curly Mommy

This has been a difficult post to write. I have tried at least four times, and the correct words just won't form. Is it because of my codependent nature? Am I afraid of disappointing the blogging homeschoolers? I think so. I guess I'll just make it as simple as it is. We will not be homeschooling next year. We will be sending our daughter, Tater, to a Christian school for kindergarten. I feel taking Tater out of preschool last fall was the right decision. I can't describe the satisfaction I feel knowing that I taught her so many of the things that she knows. It is wonderful to plan our days according to what we need or want to do, not the schedule of an institution. I enjoy spending these days with her so much... However, I feel that an enormous burden has been lifted from my shoulders. Yes, homeschooling her next year is a burden that I don't think I can bear. I really don't think I would be capable of giving my kids what they need next year if I had to homeschool....

I love decorating cakes. Here are a few of the ones I've made over the last year. I'm still learning.

This morning I turned on my CD player. I needed music to clean the kitchen by. Switchfoot's album, The Beautiful Letdown, was in the changer. Yardboy gave it to me as a gift when I was miserable in my pregnancy with Little Man. I used to listen to it all the time, but not so much lately. This morning one of the songs meant much more to me than it ever did. I think it is because I am actively seeking God for change in my life. I want to be more than just okay. More Than Fine When I wake in the morning I want to blow into pieces I want more than just okay, more than just okay When I'm up with the sunshine I want more than just a good time I want more than just okay, more than just okay I'm not givin' up, givin' up now I'm not givin' up, not backing down More than fine, more than bent on getting by More than fine, more than just okay When I'm lit with sunrise I want more than just the blue skies I want more than just okay, more than okay More than oceans ...

Wow! It is amazing how much I have changed and grown since last September. Blogging helps me to fully explore my thoughts on a subject. I feel I know myself better when I write (or type) everything out. I know, you are thinking that my thoughts are pretty shallow, but the ones you see here are only a fraction of what has materialized since September. Being willing to put simple, non-threatening thoughts in a public forum has lead me to honestly journal and admit to my deepest, most secret thoughts, if only to myself. This is what my old proflie looked like: Curly Mommy Gender: Female Occupation: At home mom with a Registered Nurse license Location: Southeast : United States About Me I am a Christian, stay-at-home, homeschooling, MOPS mom of two, Tater and Little Man. My husband, Yardboy, can't believe I am blogging. I am working on becoming a Lactation Consultant. I believe in eating whole, natural foods, but I am too cheap to buy organic most of the time. I am creative and good wi...

YES! Do I obsess about hurting others' feelings? YES! Do I make things worse by trying to fix the codependent messes I make? YES! Do I make others' problems my own? YES! Do I fear letting new friends in? YES! Terrified! I want to have friends, but I am so afraid that I will screw thing up like I have in the past. I NEED to have HEALTHY friendships! This is what I read this morning: Proverbs 29:25 (Amplified Bible) The fear of man brings a snare, but whoever leans on, trusts in, and puts his confidence in the Lord is safe and set on high. Proverbs 29:25 (The Message) The fear of human opinion disables; trusting in God protects you from that. Proverbs 29:25 (New Living Translation) Fearing people is a dangerous trap, but trusting the Lord means safety. I need to cling to HIM if I am going to have healthy friendships. I need to do what HE desires for me. Will the rest fall into place if I totally depend on HIM? Yes,I think so.

Have you ever stood at the edge of the ocean and watched the waves come in? God's love is like the waves-- constant, steady, sure. He says His mercies are new every morning. Every day we get a new wave of His mercy, grace, and love. by: Holley Gerth *** Lamentations 3:22-24 (The Message) God's loyal love couldn't have run out, his merciful love couldn't have dried up. They're created new every morning. How great your faithfulness! I'm sticking with God (I say it over and over). He's all I've got left.

Blogging helps me to fully explore my thoughts on various subjects. I feel I know myself better when I write (or type) everything out. I know, you are thinking that my thoughts are pretty shallow, but the ones you see here are only a fraction of what has materialized since September. Being willing to put simple, non-threatening thoughts in a public forum has gradually lead me to honestly journal and admit to my deepest, most secret thoughts, if only to myself. Sunny, Thank you so much for gently pushing me toward blogging. Blog Friends, Thank you for reading and commenting. Thank you for allowing me to read and comment on your posts. Family and Face-to-Face Friends, Thank you for not rolling your eyes when I get overly excited about a blog.

Everyone knows this part of the Serenity Prayer. Here is the entire prayer by Reinhold Niebuhr: * God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time, enjoying one moment at a time; accepting hardship as the pathway to peace; taking, as Jesus did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it; trusting that You will make all things right if I surrender to Your will; so that I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with You forever in the next. Amen. * As you can see, I couldn't resist the Seinfeld reference. :) *

Heirloom rose bush from my parents. Deuteronomy 5:16 (New International Version) Honor your father and your mother, as the LORD your God has commanded you, so that you may live long and that it may go well with you in the land the LORD your God is giving you. . Check out this video about parents. .

This morning I excitedly told Tater all about the upcoming lunar eclipse. I showed her some websites and even found one with a video and very dramatic music. She agreed that she wanted to see the eclipse, but wanted to get back to Qubo . The email I received from the local homeschool association said that the eclipse would be best viewed at 6:29 pm on the eastern horizon. So, after a Pizza Hut dinner, we hopped into Yardboy's truck in search of the eastern horizon. Two problems. First, we live in a hilly, southern city that really values trees. There isn't much horizon to be found. Second, this evening was very overcast. After ruling out our first few options, we got an a four-lane highway and headed due east in search of some clear (or slightly less cloudy) horizon. After driving 23 moonless miles, we decided to go home. We were so disappointed, especially Tater. When we made our turn we saw the most spectacular sunset ever! All that time we had been searching and we were...