The Fuzzball Chronicles: the Life and Times of Curly Mommy

PRAYER FOR SERENITY God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time, enjoying one moment at a time; accepting hardship as a pathway to peace; taking, as Jesus did, this sinful world as it is; not as I would have it; trusting that You will make all things right if I surrender to your will; so that I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with You forever in the next. AMEN - Reinhold Niebuhr - --------------------------- Breathing My friend posted this song on her blog. It touched me deeply. I have everything I ever wanted, but so often I feel like I'm just surviving, not thriving. Anything else would be more than I could handle. I know that those are the times when I should cry out to God, but even that seems more than I am capable of doing. Sometimes all I can do is hide behind my facade and keep breathing.

I know these thoughts are not healthy, But I have to give them a voice. If I don't acknowledge the pain, How can it ever get better? So, Here goes... Where are you? Are you ever coming back? I'm lonely. I miss my friend. I guess you are in survival mode now. The pain must be immense. I don't know. I assume. I didn't cause the pain, So why do you run from me when hurt? Maybe I pushed too hard. Maybe I expected too much. I suppose you don't have the reserve to deal with my issues too. I must not be safe anymore. I don't want to add my insecurities to you burden, But I can't stand this silence!

Today is the first birthday of The Fuzzball Chronicles! Wow! I actually did something for an entire year. I'm proud of myself.

I frantically cleaned before Drason, Crickey, and Smiley Boy came over yesterday. Drason has been here before, but it was the first visit for Crickey and Smiley Boy. I wanted to make a good first impression. Well, actually I just didn't want to be totally embarassed. Of course, the house wasn't anywhere near as clean as I would have liked it to be. At least the bathroom wasn't disgusting. After cleaning the kitchen, and picking up most of the choking hazards, I came to my senses. They weren't coming to see my house. They weren't coming over to evaluate my homekeeping skills. They were coming to see me. I'm usually comfortable in my messy home. If someone is a true friend, I should feel comfortable with them in my messy house with me. Now I'm not saying that I should subject friends to poopy diaper scent, science projects in the kitchen sink, and a skanky bathroom. I am saying that I need to be more willing to open my door to others in spite of strewn toys,

Tater and Little Man are both in school ! They go to a half-day Kindergarten and preschool . Little man goes three days a week and of course Tater goes five days a week. They both seem to enjoy it so much. I'm glad we chose to put them in a school.

Hi, I'm a believer in Christ Jesus who is recovering from Codependency. My name is Curly. God has an interesting way of giving us what we need. I prayed for The Bulldog's heart to be softened. I don't know what God did to his heart, but he softened my heart. One night last week I sat down at the computer and typed out an apology. Here is a small portion of the apology: I feel I must make amends. Our conversation left me with a deep ache that isn’t going away. I’ve never been good at conveying my feelings gently. Sometimes my passion gets me in trouble. I tend to present the unvarnished truth, and it isn’t always received in the way I intend. I think you and I are very similar in that respect. I meant no harm, but my words must have seemed threatening. I am sorry. I simply wanted to share with you how God has been touching me, my family, and my friends. I wanted to share my joy with you. I did not intend to force anything on you or imply that you are doing anything wrong. Pl