Okay, it is time for another post about Celebrate Recovery. It is interesting to me that I get very few comments when I discuss my "issues." Feel free to chime in.
On Friday night I tried out the Codependent Small Group. Boy, did I ever fit in there!
If you read some of my earlier posts, then you know just how much I let the troubles of others' drag me down.
I take their troubles and make them my own.
I try to help or fix the issues or fix the person (not that I have ever succeeded).
I obsess about their problem to the point of dreaming about them and having physical symptoms of stress (nausea, abdominal pain, muscle pain, headaches).
I get really depressed.
I get anxious if I can't talk to my project person. Why won't they answer the stupid phone? What if they committed suicide? What if they are in the hospital? What if? What if? What if?
I get angry if they don't fix the issue, if someone else continues to hurt them, if they won't seek help, or if they relapse into more bad behavior.
I second guess myself constantly. Why did I say that? Did I offend them? What if they don't like me anymore? Maybe that is why they won't answer the phone.
Mercy is one of my spiritual gifts. Go figure, I went to school for four years to become and "angel of mercy." I have to learn how to use my gift in a way that doesn't destroy me or the object of my love and mercy.