Thursday, October 12

Secrets

Everybody knows about me. I really don't have many secrets. For the most part, I am an open book.

I guess that is why It infuriates me to learn that some truth has been kept from me.
I feel betrayed.
I feel that I have a right to know.
I feel lied to.

Then I lose control and my words hurt the ones I love.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"It hurts me that you kept this from me."
"If you kept this from me, what else are you hiding?"
"I don't know you."
"Who are you?"

Ugh! That's stupid! They finally confide in me and I put a guilt trip on them.

Maybe I need to just expect secrets. Everybody has something to hide. Right? People keep secrets to protect themselves and the ones they love. I have to learn not to take it personally. It isn't about me. It is about keeping hurt, guilt, shame, and anger at bay.

If any of you have shared a secret with me and I reacted badly, I am truly sorry.

If any of you want to confide in me in the future, I will listen without judging.

If you want to keep your pain to yourself, that is fine. I will respect that.

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